|
|
 |
|
| |
|
|
ExamForce :: Article Archive :: Newsletter Article
 The Cert Times: IT Edition Article Archive
|
| An OS by Any Other Name Would Still End up in Court (B1N@RY N@T10N (A.J. Axline)) |
Windows 95. Windows 98. Windows NT. Windows ME. Windows 2000. Windows XP.
Windows Vista.
I don't know, my friends. I just don't know.
Vista. It's a funny word, really. It almost sounds like a medical condition. "Mister Axline, you are suffering from an acute intestinal Vista. We won't know more until we get you hooked up to the Recovery Console."
I give Microsoft credit for trying to break out of the traditional two-letter/two-number naming convention. At the very least, the Redmond folks deserve a nod for adding a full noun to the Windows name for this upcoming iteration. But still, Windows Vista...
See, I can't even say it without feeling like I'm ordering wine at an Italian bistro. "Yes, we'll have a carafe of the Windows Vista, and a plate of hominy grits. Oh, sorry, the Torta Tricolore di Polenta."
Of course, because our world is currently filled with litigious scumbags who are more than willing to cry "Victim!" at the drop of a gavel, there are several possible legal complications on the horizon for Microsoft because of its choice of name for the next version of Windows. Possible contestants in this legal game show include a software and services company named Vista Incorporated; two entirely separate software companies, both inexplicably named Vista Software; VistaPrint, an online print shop; and VISTA—also known as Volunteers In Service To America, a national volunteer services group. These are just a few of the groups who may decide to take their chances at the wheel of fortune in the litigation casino that used to be our judicial system. Hell, there's probably some buttwad out there whose last name is Vista who is already sitting in a lawyer's office, planning on how he's going to refurnish his stinkhole bungalow with his cut of the 'emotional damages' settlement.
(Please note that I'm not assuming that any of the above groups are, in fact, litigious scumbags... with the exception of the hypothetical buttwad I presented at the end of the paragraph. Also please note that I normally try not to use the words "scumbags" and "buttwad" as often as I have in the last few sentences—in fact, as I have just done in this overly-complicated aside.)
Now, it may not seem apropos to defend a company that, back in 2005, jumped on Canadian teenager Mike Rowe with a 25-page document demanding that he transfer ownership of his domain mikerowesoft.com over to them, offering $10 in compensation for his domain, time, and effort, and threatening legal action if he didn't comply. Talk about good PR... maybe the company rep who fumbled that particular handoff could have included a few pictures of Steve Ballmer kicking widows and orphans out of their homes and into the street in the middle of winter, all while wearing a Scrooge McDuck parka.
But, two wrongs don't make a right. I am not defending Microsoft as much as I am defending common sense. A company should not have to create new words in the English language in order to name a new product. Just as it was ridiculous when Microsoft went apepoop at Mike Rowe or at the company that created Lindows, it is ridiculous for any company, organization, or individual to believe that Windows Vista is going to somehow undermine their existence on this planet.
However, I fully expect that as we get closer to the release of Windows Vista there will be a number of legal actions and counter-suits, and all of the lawyers will lick their chops while the rest of us wonder why software, and everything else we purchase in our day-to-day lives, is as expensive as it is.
Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go drown my sorrows in a glass of Cabernet Solaris.
A.J. Axline
B1N@RY N@T10N
A.J. Axline is the author of the recently published book Closet Universe, which is now available for sale at Lulu.com. A.J. spends much of his spare time at closetuniverse.com, and is currently taking a very hot shower.
|
|
|
Posted by
nam on 28/03/2006 08:49 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
ExamForce, Inc. is not sponsored by, endorsed by, or affiliated with Cisco Systems, Inc. Cisco®, Cisco Systems®, CCDA™, CCNA™, CCDP™, CCNP™, CCIE™, CCSI™, the Cisco Systems logo, and the CCIE logo are trademarks or registered trademarks of Cisco Systems, Inc. in the United States and certain other countries. All other trademarks, including those of Microsoft, CompTIA, and Citrix are trademarks of their respective owners.
|
|
|
|
 |
|
