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ExamForce :: Article Archive :: Newsletter Article
 The Cert Times: IT Edition Article Archive
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| A Quick Chat with Binary Nation (B1N@RY N@T10N (A.J. Axline)) |
Depending on who you ask, they are a syncopated pop duo, a pair of maverick computer scientists, or "people of interest." They are definitely A.J. Axline and Vector the Spectre, the founders of the virtual country known as Binary Nation. It's been three years since we last spoke to them, so The Cert Times sent a reporter to catch up with the two people that Time Magazine referred to as, "Who?"
CT: What has been the most profound change to the IT industry in the three years since we last spoke to you two?
VTS: Well, it's all buggered up, isn't it?
AJA: It's safe to say that the great IT worker shortage hasn't happened as predicted. The job market is still stuffed with candidates, offshore or otherwise. I think what's changed is that the people who got into IT at the start of the century because they were chasing the money, have moved on to other things. IT service became a commodity, just like the hardware.
CT: What is the average IT worker like today, as opposed to the late 1990s?
AJA: He or she is two inches taller, and doesn't have all of their teeth.
VTS: Due to scurvy. They are malnourished, subsisting on a diet of bad office coffee, microwave lunches, and cheap gin.
AJA: Many of them have lost fingers.
VTS: You're thinking of shop teachers.
AJA: And, most of them like bacon.
VTS: A little too much...
CT: Do you see IT hiring trends heating up as the country recovers from the current recession?
VTS: Which country would that be?
AJA: The Undiscovered Country...
VTS: ST6, man.
AJA: A Shakespeare-quoting Klingon. I don't know. I can't see Shakespeare being on the curriculum at Klingon High.
VTS: It could have been an elective.
AJA: Crammed in between Disembowelment in period two, and lunch.
VTS: We are a long way from recovering anything, Jack. The Wall Street criminals aren't done yet. Until they pull back their tentacles...
AJA: Their slimy, gelid tentacles...
VTS: Like Cthuhlu.
AJA: Until the Elder Gods fall back asleep, the average person is more or less screwed.
VTS: Likely more screwed.
AJA: More screwed than... than a cork in a bottle of wine at David Hasselhoff's house.
VTS: Dude, WTF?
AJA: I'm sorry. I panicked.
CT: The consumer focus has pulled away from desktop computing, and is focused on mobile computing devices such as laptops and smartphones. What do you think this will mean for software companies looking to create new revenue streams?
AJA: They have to make their icons smaller.
VTS: God, these are boring questions. Let's taser him.
AJA: They should have built a taser into the iPhone.
VTS: And, a mace dispenser.
AJA: And a spork!
VTS: A taser spork that dispenses mace.
CT: Um, moving on... is there any new technology that has impressed you recently?
VTS: I like that pill camera that you can swallow, and it takes pictures of your digestive tract and automatically uploads them to your Flickr site.
AJA: The next version of that will be a smart pill, capable of Tweeting while it goes through your guts.
VTS: "Esophagus! WHEEEEEE!"
AJA: "Polyps rhymes with trollops."
VTS: "I'm in yr duodenum, snappin yr tumors!"
AJA: "I can has bowel cancer?"
CT: Given the current economic situation, have the two of you had to make any cutbacks to Binary Nation?
AJA: Well, I don't get as many "happy ending" shoeshines as I used to.
VTS: I've had to adjust the schedule of our nuclear program.
AJA: We won't have reactors until 2012.
VTS: Looks like those Aztecs were right.
(Both laugh for several minutes.)
CT: Finally, if you could say anything to a young adult who is just starting their career as an IT specialist, what would you tell them?
AJA: Bring a pillow. It gives you something to put under your tummy when you get bent over the sawhorse by your employer. Less splinters!
VTS: I would tell them that it's a job like many other jobs. It isn't going to make them rich, and it isn't going to be a dream come true. If you make it, it's going to put food on the table and a roof over your head. In the end, you still spend a lot of your time resetting passwords and rebooting servers. It's not glamorous. If you want glamorous, get your MBA and become a CIO. At least that way you'll get to sit at the senior leadership table at dinner time.
AJA: That's a very measured, thoughtful response, Vector.
VTS: Thank you.
AJA: What about the pillow?
VTS: Oh yeah, totally bring a pillow. Belly splinters suck.
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Posted by
nam on 29/06/2009 10:20 |
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